The Key to True Happiness

key to true happiness

The other day, I was driving to the supermarket with my youngest daughter, aged three. On the way, there is a slight decent as the road crosses under the railway. To me, that’s just something that happens, nothing special. To her, it’s a completely different story. So, we were driving to the store, started going downhill and she immediately threw her arms up, stretched her legs and cried out of pure joy: “Wheeeee!”.  Her happiness was so contagious that I joined her on the way up, throwing my arms up and shouting out. It felt wonderful! Most times, expressing emotions feels like the complete opposite for me. Something happens, for instance, I take a bite of a mango with a magnificent …

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To you, my brother

To you, my brother

For years, I’ve neglected you, merely tolerated you, seen you as competition. Your strength made me feel inadequate and your weakness made me feel strong in comparison. When you connected with a girl, I felt jealous; it felt like I had lost something, even when I had never spoken to her, or liked her in the first place. I avoided you because you made me feel uncomfortable. Interacting this way with you, my brother, made me feel weak, alone and I compensated by seeking validation from others, mostly women. Seeking this approval didn’t help me, I know see it led me further from my core. Lately, I’ve started to see your value. For the first time in my life, I …

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Can you be intimate without being sexual?

Most people love to touch the ones they are fond of. At the same time, touching others is often shrouded in anxiety: what if I do something wrong, go too far, or inadvertently touch the ‘wrong’ body part? Because of this anxiety to touch someone in the wrong way, or be touched in the wrong way, many of us chicken out and refrain from touching at all, especially in the Western world. We distance ourselves from others, barely touching, only when it cannot be avoided. The effect is that many feel alone, cut off from others. Is there another way? Can you be intimate without being sexual and reclaim touching, intimacy, in such a way that it serves us instead of …

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